pardon my absence and church

My deepest apologies for my two break from blogging. I can come up with a couple excuses, but I'll blame it on a very busy two weeks at work. Oh, I'll blame it on the economy too...for no reason, but these days everyone is blaming their issues on the economy. Bad hair day? Blame it on the economy! Expired yogurt in the fridge? Well that's got to be Matoff's fault. So yeah, stupid economy, how dare you prevent me from blogging.

I went to church today. That's a big deal for me. I haven't been to church, aside for attending one baptism and five weddings, in over a year. It's always easier for me to find something much better to do with my Sunday morning. Sometimes I don't feel so bad about my alternative choices, like when I take the morning to exercise. Being outside and exercising is easily, if not more healing and introspective to me than church. I've always challenged the church's (referring to ALL religions here, not just mine) beliefs on what God is and is not. I don't know if there's a higher being. I really don't. Let me rephrase that, I don't know if my higher being is what my religion says he is. I don't know if Jesus ever existed. I don't know if this earth ever had a man living on it that did the amazing and great things the Bible says he did. Sadly, I don't have that sort of faith in the human race to think that there is someone out there that could selflessly do all they say he did. Hmm, I think I might start upsetting people here, so I'll bring this little thought to a conclusion. To sum it up, I challenge all religions and I'm skeptical of any institution that claims to bring people together, but yet so many people, the world over, have died for. A quick lesson in sociology for you: if you look at most "religious wars" in this world's history, they aren't about religion at all. Rather they are wars over resources -- water, land, food, shelter. It's a true fact. Do your homework and you'll agree. Religion just gets messed up in it and people easily use it as an excuse to hate each other. It's disgusting.

Anyway, back to me going to church today. Despite all that I've said above, it felt great being there. I went to St. Luke's in Los Gatos. I've been wanting to go for a long time now and today seemed as good a day as any. The service was nice, a typical 8:00am Episcopal service. Short, sweet, and to the point. Because I grew up going to the Episcopal church I know a lot of what is said throughout the service by heart. Going to church makes me feel like I'm back home. It brings back so many memories of time spent with mom and Kate. (Dad always got a hall pass) Nothing will beat the services of my childhood, but it's fun for me to say the things like the Lord's Prayer that I said all those years of my life as a child. I usually tune out during the gospel, lessons, and sermon because they're a little too churchy for me. Instead I take those moments to enjoy the peacefulness of my location. My world stops when I'm at church and it excites me to no end. I feel the same way when I'm practicing yoga or running. Nothing else matters except that moment. It's calm, quite, and no one can burst my happy bubble. That's what I love about church and that's why I choose to go when I do. It's a free therapy session even if I don't listen to the therapist.

I'll try to go more often as I know I need that free therapy session in my life. That's all for now.